Setting Your Job Start Date: Why Taking Time Between Jobs is Essential

Yesterday my mentee and I met for one last breakfast before she heads off to her new job. She recently graduated from Brown University with a B.S. in Biomedical Engineering and is about to begin a management position at a specialty medical device startup in New Jersey.

This lady has her stuff together—she interned at the company last summer, they offered her a position last fall, and she's spent the interim preparing herself for the operational and leadership challenges she's about to step into. (Which made for great questions and conversations about authentic leadership all. year. long.)

One of those questions was about her start date. Seemingly, an easy one. 

The owners of the company are understandably eager for her to get started. They asked her to begin right after graduation, with a day or two to relocate. 

That felt fast to her, but she wanted to make a good impression. 

"What am I allowed to ask for here?" she wanted to know.

When should my start date be?

I've seen so many mission-driven leaders dive headfirst into new jobs in a hurry. If their last day at one organization is on a Friday, they'll start the new job on Monday. And why not? They're excited to step into new challenges and the organization needed them there yesterday.

But something I've noticed during is that these rapid transitions don't give us time to heal.

Healing isn't something we usually talk about in connection with work. But hear me out:

• When your last work environment or supervisor was toxic and you're making a change to improve your quality of life—you need time to acknowledge those wounds.

• When your former organization stretched you thin without letup—you need space to decompress.

• When you lost your mojo for the work and are burned out—you need the opportunity to enjoy things that bring you alive again.

• Even when you loved your company and coworkers and it's a bittersweet parting because you know it's time to step into a new challenge—you need to acknowledge the ending of that chapter and mark this milestone in your growth.

Take the time you need to transition

William Bridges taught us the distinction between change and transition: Change is an event, a distinct happening like a last day at work. Transition is the internal process of integrating that change into ourselves.

We tend to move through the change without allowing space for the transition.

You might think that if you rush right into the next thing, you'll prove your dedication, commitment, and drive—but you are really doing a disservice to both yourself and the organization you're joining. 

You’ll start your new work with the gas tank on empty. You’ll carry with you the baggage of what you've just been through, and make yourself work through that while being the newbie. You’ll set aside your own needs as a martyr to the mission of the organization.

To be sure, not everyone has the privilege of taking time off. Some of us need to get right on the payroll or health insurance of our next company in order to make ends meet. But I’ve found that even when that isn’t the case, mission-driven leaders are hesitant to take the time the need out of a misguided sense of service to others or a fear of slowing down.

If you carve out the time to put yourself back together, you'll be whole as you step into the new role, ready to make contributions and impacts through your best work. You'll set yourself up for sustainable and successful work.

Setting yourself up for sustainable success in a new job

Our work culture in America tells us that productivity is paramount and gaps are a weakness. But how true is that, really?

When I am whole, I am stronger—not weaker. When I set boundaries and ask for what I need, others respect me more—not less. When I set myself up for sustainable success, I perform better, am more fulfilled, and more impactful. 

So please, take some time between jobs to heal, become whole, and ready yourself that what's next. You—and everyone around you—will benefit. 

As for my mentee? She took a month to celebrate the milestone of graduation and integrate this transition into the real world. She'll be ready to take them by storm.